Over the years there have been numerous books published on the topic of relationships. Most notably, Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider focused on how to be a “rules girl” and “snag a man.” Contrary to their beliefs, the way to a committed and loving relationship with a man is not playing games. Men are not the easiest creatures to figure out but I believe that for the most part women do understand what men want from relationships.
My friends and I have discussed this issue at length and we have come up with the same ideas. First off, men want someone who won’t judge. A woman who nags a man about his habits or the way he acts is definitely not what a man wants in a relationship.
Women realize that men want a companion and not a mother figure. Also, a man wants understanding and support from the one he is with. He wants someone who will be there to support him no matter what.
It is important to a man that his significant other has a life of her own and her own friends. A guy’s friends are very important to him and something that he will not sacrifice to spend time with his girlfriend 24/7. A woman’s understanding of this is key in making the relationship work.
There is a lot of peer pressure that goes along with males in relationships. Numerous times I’ve been in a room with a bunch of guys when one has to leave to call his girlfriend. Inevitably the phrase, “You are so whipped,” is yelled out by his friends.
Women know that men want closeness and affection, yet at the same time do not want to run the risk of being “whipped.” Women believe that men don’t want to be submissive to a female in a relationship. Males like to think that they are the ones wearing the pants and many females allow them to think that they are.
This is because women understand that men need to feel a semblance of a sense of power. In a nutshell, males like to feel a sense of control in their relationships because otherwise it will just eat away at their pride.
There have been many times when I’ve had come to me and complain that their boyfriends were infuriated because they were just being friendly with another guy. I realize that some males sometimes confuse friendliness with flirtation.
I believe a man needs to feel as though he is the “only one.” Though he doesn’t want to be the typical over-protective boyfriend, he wants to be sure she isn’t gallivanting around town with other young men. Even a friendly exchange of words with another guy may be perceived as a threat.
The better we understand men, the easier it will be to have healthy relationships. Just like snowflakes, no two men are exactly alike and although we try, we women are not exactly mind readers. Therefore, it’s up to you guys to tell us what you really want to make our relationships truly work.