Justin Timberlake is the new Rambo. No, I didn’t eat peyote buttons before sitting down to dish out Dirt. UK newsrag the Sun reports that Timberlake has just signed on for the leading role in the army flick Stop Loss. Timberlake will play a “Rambo-style American Iraq War hero.”
I would insert “LOL” here, but I’m too classy. A second LP from Timberlake is also approaching, produced by hitmaker Rick Rubin. Me thinks this summer will be all about the Mouseketeers, what with La Christina Aguilera releasing her anticipated jazz-inspired album as well.
Demi Moore is pregnant again. At “43.”
Things that confuse me this week: Why Kristin Cavallari is on another magazine cover (Teen People), why Conrad is the hottest Hilton on the block (he’s like 9 years old), why Nicole and Paris switched haircuts, why Three 6 Mafia haven’t put the Oscar down yet (literally, they’re carrying it around like any other member of the entourage).
Whatever. Remember Jessica Simpson giving the poo-poo face in W magazine last month? Crying about how music is her passion but probably not a career choice for her anymore? Right. She’s dumb as a fox. Our dear old Jess was slapping a big sale tag on herself – and it worked. She’s dropped Columbia Records as her supporting label and is over to Epic.
Lindsay Lohan, watch your back! La Mariah is after you, girl! Rumor has it that while Mimi was filming her latest video in the Paris flagship store of Louis Vuitton, some higher-ups kinda liked the look. Meaning that the label is quietly considering bringing Mariah aboard to sling some product. There’s been no comment on how this could affect the potential deal Lohan has with the designers. In my opinion, Dirtlings, Mariah is too strong a brand on her own to rep someone else. She is, however, lookin’ so thin. And isn’t that all that matters?
Gay, gay, gay Clay Aiken is trying a new tactic to defray his homosexuality: going everywhere with beautiful women. Clay, honey, gorgeous girls don’t make a difference when your dates consist of mani/pedis, Sex and the City marathons and late night Taco Bell trips.
Flashity-flash: Dave Navarro isn’t wearing his wedding ring anymore, reports an insider to gossip blog Egotastic! Pity. It’s another celebrity split, but I doubt Dave and wifey Carmen Electra will get any covers this week.
But the Latina’s got the heat, and they love to keep it all in the family. Jennifer Lopez is tapping Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria to pair up on-screen. The untitled comedy will pit Lopez and Longoria as showbiz sisters who try to ruin each other through the media. No confirmation, but it could start in the fall.
Good luck to you and yours, and look for a special Dirt next week.
Matt Donnelly can be reached at DirtTheFragrance@yahoo.com.