Sex and gossip. The spice of life. That makes me chili powder and my good friend Matt over there wasabi powder. Hot hot hot.
As with all long-standing addictions, yours with some of The Temple News’ columns must come to an excruciating end. In true Donnelly form, Matt has 900 words more to say about it than I do, crippling my word count and confining me to two measly farewell columns – probably for the better. I tend to get all blubbery in my nostalgia.
To keep things short and sweet, and to maintain my illusion of celebrity (it’s a long fall from columnist grace for my ego), I give you the abbreviated guide to life according to Nadia.
Never, ever stop learning. Profound. I know. Of all the knowledge I have accrued up to this moment of my existence, the greatest thing I could teach is that expanding your mind is an ongoing process. It is infinite. At no point is your mind officially “expanded.” Those who decide otherwise become stagnant, defensive and crotchety – some at the ripe age of 18, others at 80.
This is not age-sensitive. Strive to look at everything in life – from a late bus to a layoff to a failed attempt at fellatio – as an opportunity to take something from the experience. It’s entertaining, almost, how chosing one perspective over the other changes the actions you take accordingly. If I miss the subway, I can (and usually do) sulk about the seven minutes of my life lost and wasted in the barren expanse of tiled underground.
Or, I can see it as a lesson in patience, and proof that all of my actions up to that point (an extra 30 seconds taming my mane of JBFed hair, the two minutes I spent looking for my other shoe, an excessive 20-minute shower), have placed me squarely on the bench listening to the ramblings of a nearby teenager on her cell phone. Odds are my bad mood is going to affect everyone else who comes in contact with me for however long I’m rolling around in my negativity. I’m going to create my own reality.
What world do I want to live in?
Never stop learning. Never stop growing. Take it to your relationships. Take it to your one-night stands. Take it to home to your vibrator. Take it out to the rest of the world.Give it to yourself. If you aren’t happy with the way something is, try facing it in a new way. Doing the same things and expecting different results doesn’t make much sense, does it?
And, for God’s sake, have a good time and laugh at yourself. You don’t have a lot of time to hang around here. Take what you’ve got and do something with it because you believe in it – not because someone told you to or expects you to or thinks you should or doesn’t think you have a chance in hell otherwise.
Today is your day, and it’s all you’ve got. What are you going to do with it?
Nadia Stadnycki can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.