WHAT’S SO BAD ABOUT PAPER?

Paper is our friend. It makes up our books, our birth certificates, our fake IDs, and our VCR instruction manuals. Can you imagine how much help it would be if they just gave you a

Paper is our friend. It makes up our books, our birth certificates, our fake IDs, and our VCR instruction manuals.

Can you imagine how much help it would be if they just gave you a tape with your new VCR? Consequently, paper also allows you to have the periodical you now hold in your hands.

I like paper. It’s provided me with Dr. Seuss, “Curious George”, “Clifford the Big Red Dog” and the greatest of all children’s reading, the TV Guide. My problem is this-going to my classes this week I was expecting two things: 1) to be let out really, really early and 2) a paper syllabus.

Instead, all the teachers actually taught the first day and three-out-of-five professors referred me to an Internet address. They told us if we wanted the syllabus on paper we could go to the course website and print it ourselves.

Maybe I’m a bit old fashioned, but I still like things I can put in folders, hold, fold or burn as I please. Now I realize there might be a valid reason for switching a syllabus to the electronic form. Paper means cutting down trees and cutting down trees means we might disturb the spotted owl. Of course, disturbing the spotted owl would perturb some of our tree hugging brethren.

While I can still get it printed on paper, let me say I do actually like to camp and look at all the pretty birds. But also allow me to let you in on something… nature not only adapts but it rebuilds. When trees are cut down they regenerate. Besides, as I once learned from a science syllabus, the food chain is a vicious cycle. Sorry, we as people are currently on top.

I am also not Henry David Thoreau sitting on Walden Pond. I do use computers in my daily life but I’m a bit more proud of my bookshelf as opposed to my computer desktop.

I use computers regularly to check e-mail, download commercials and illegal MP3 files. I also use it to do papers which I have the common decency to print out and hand in to my professors when they expect them. So why can’t they do the same with my syllabus?

All I’m asking for is a chance to learn about what the heck is going on in the course and when you want me to show up next. Is that really so much to ask for?

I realize that new technological advances like those our instructors are attempting to use in Tuttleman are nice. If you think about it though, paper has been an alternative here in the lower 48 states for well over 200 years.

Why risk getting carpal tunnel syndrome when paper cuts are so much more easy to deal with in the long run?

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