Fashion bloodbath is seventh sign of apocalypse

Before we get to the real dirt, I must dutifully report that (if you haven’t heard in the past six days) Britney Spears gave birth to a healthy baby boy, Preston Michael (aww, baby’s first

Before we get to the real dirt, I must dutifully report that (if you haven’t heard in the past six days) Britney Spears gave birth to a healthy baby boy, Preston Michael (aww, baby’s first name in bold!), on Wednesday, Sept. 14. Us Weekly reported that Spears was taken into a delivery room around 12:15 p.m. with husband and dancer/rapper/socks-and-sandals wearer Kevin Federline by her side. She delivered via Caeserean section.

Britney, Victoria Beckham should have some great advice on dropping that baby weight before you step foot out of the hospital. Mazel-mazel on the baby, Federline’s, good things always.

Anyway … Diane Von Furstenberg has more on her conscience then saturating the global fashion market with her striped wrap dress-now she’s drawing blood.

In case we’re unaware, readers, the fashion equivalent of the G8 Summit occurred last week in Manhattan’s Bryant Park and surrounding studio spaces: New York Fashion Week. Sponsored yet again by Olympus, Fashion Week (womenswear) occurs twice annually, trumpeting the forthcoming season’s looks.

At Miss Von Furstenberg’s fete, an amazing collection calling on Grecian tones and cuts, an entire lighting rig came crashing down, injuring several elite editors and writers.

Counted among them was Cosmopolitan fashion director Karen Haynes and the Daily Telegraph critic Hilary Alexander. The real victims, however, were The Daily’s European editor Karl Treacy and Teen Vogue’s Amy Astley. Astley suffered a cut on the back of the neck (ruining her top) and Treacy a blow to the head, which caused bleeding from the side of his face.

Tonight on Fox: When the Front Row Attacks.

Publicists wrapped the situation quickly and tightly. Don’t be surprised if you see certain editors with Band-Aids and a trunk full of the entire Spring 2006 Von Furstenberg collection.

Other Fashion Week news: Paris is everywhere (including the new issue of Vanity Fair, joining the ranks of other cover-girls depicted holding their own breasts) at every show at every time … ever. Some front row chumminess between Eva Longoria and Candace Bushnell, some front row beef between Brandy and Serena Williams at the Luca Luca unveiling (oooh, fierce), Kelly Osbourne trying to show off a thinner, post-rehab figure. Trying.

Some friends of mine shared the rumor that got the most mileage among the glitterati in the crisp white tents: whispers say Anderson Cooper is the biological father of Camryn Manheim‘s son. They also emphasized he was a sperm donor, not a birds and bees kind of conceiver. Wonder why …

Can I get excited about something non-fashion? How about David LaChapelle and Madonna coming together again to film the video for Madge’s upcoming single “Hung Up?” Work.

Tina Fey and the love-of-God-woman-have-that-baby Heidi Klum have popped out puppies. Joy.

Taking a cue from Gwyneth, 50 Cent gives his two cents on Brad and Angelina.

“If Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt were open, they wouldn’t have paparazzi following them,” he said. It comforts me that Fiddy wants Brangelina to confess their love, too.

Kate Moss is set to edit the December/January issue of French Vogue. No comment, except I love thin people and beautiful magazines. And hate when it’s done badly.

Sir Richard Branson has slapped his name on yet another good and service-a product that needs “to be accessible to the masses.” You’ve got it: twist cap wine. The New York Post reports that Branson is sick of the snobbery attached to the grape-gushing tradition and wants to give the tempest-tossed a shot at becoming winos.

Isn’t that what it’s about, kids? Unity.

Matt Donnelley can be reached at mattdonn@temple.edu.

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