Nip, tuck and tie with a bow

I don’t know about you, but I love gifts. Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and graduation are all just measly events that support the process of gift-giving. So what’s a better gift than a boob job, a

I don’t know about you, but I love gifts. Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and graduation are all just measly events that support the process of gift-giving.

So what’s a better gift than a boob job, a tummy tuck or my personal favorite – rhinoplasty?

Nothing says “I love you” more than pre-paid plastic surgery. And by “I love you,” I mean, “I don’t like the way you look, so change it. But don’t worry, babe. It’s on me.”

I am not making this up. It seems that more and more plastic surgeries are becoming
not only a common personal decision, but a suggestion from loved ones in the form of a present.

According to a survey coordinated last year by the American Academy of Facial Plastic
and Reconstructive Surgery, two out of five surgeons have performed surgeries that were given as gifts in 2005. Twenty-one percent
of doctors surveyed said that they have witnessed mothers and daughters getting procedures done together as a “bonding experience.”

Personally, when I want to bond with my mother, I go to lunch, not to the doctor’s office. Not only is this concept absurd, but it is morally wrong and disruptive to that child’s mental state.

Suggesting cosmetic surgery only promotes “the perfect image.” And that is a terrible thing to evoke in a young mind, especially the mind of your own child. There are enough media outlets telling us to be thinner, prettier and firmer; we don’t need that from our own families too.

Another 34 percent of surgeons said that couples are having procedures done together. Apparently the joy of enhancement is something that is even more gratifying when done with a significant other. Oh, how romantic. I don’t know about you ladies, but if my boyfriend paid for breast implants for me as a gift, it would be swiftly rewarded with a slap in the face.

All obvious jokes aside, giving something as serious as surgery as a gift is extremely risky. According to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons, there are still many concerns about this gift-giving process. It puts a lot of pressure on not only the patient to follow through with the operation, but on the surgeon to actually perform it.

Many, if not all, plastic surgeries require a consultation, and occasionally during these appointments, the doctor may feel that the patient is not a good candidate for the surgery, whether it be for health or personal reasons. But when the surgery is already a pre-paid gift, the doctor is more inclined to operate anyway.

Emotionally, a patient might not be ready for the change, or may not want it at all. But they may feel they have to go through with the procedure because their flaws have been pointed out and priced to fix.

Don’t get me wrong, paying for someone’s
cosmetic surgery can be appropriate or even thoughtful in certain situations. Surely a gift of implants to a breast cancer survivor, or laser eye surgery to your aging grandmother is a kind gesture with good intentions.

If the beneficiary of the gift is fully aware they are receiving it, or have been asking for such a donation, then the thought is not outrageous.

The purpose of giving gifts is to make someone you love happy. It’s the thought that counts. As you can imagine, however, opening a liposuction offer when you were expecting pearls is not exactly the perfect situation.

In case you are wondering how to get your hands on such a popular gift, it’s easy: Just fill out a gift certificate. Yep, that’s right, a gift certificate. They aren’t just for Best Buy or Victoria’s Secret anymore.

You can actually pre-pay your friend’s “appearance enhancer.” Cosmetic surgery gift certificates or “the gift that keeps giving,” as Doctor Direct, a company that offers materials to medical practices, likes to call it, can be found in many plastic surgery offices.

Doctor Direct also offers doctors advice on how to use and distribute the certificates.

My personal favorite is, “To add an extra touch, tie a nice ribbon around it. Nothing but the best for your patients!” So when you receive your free admission to go under the knife, at least they make it look classy.

Michelle Sears can be reached at
michelle.sears@temple.edu.

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