The “anti-Temple man” syndrome

This is a topic that I find humorous, but there are women at this school who take this matter quite seriously. It’s the “anti-Temple man” crisis.

For various reasons there are female students who choose not to date men here. Some have valid reasons, while others do not. Some acceptable reasons are they have had relationship(s) on campus and that have worked out, or they have watched their friends go through hell struggling to maintain a happy, profound relationship and wish not to go through similar situations.

Others choose not to because they do not want people prying in their business, and there are “player-haters” who will do what they can to steer you away from that special person. But the answer to that is, no matter where you are in life, there are nosy people lurking and “player-haters” who do not want you to have a happy and productive relationship.

I can understand these reasons. But to hold thousands of men accountable because one or two (maybe even three) people may have broken your heart is wrong. I have some friends and associates who fell victim to the “anti-Temple man” syndrome.

These people have dated women on campus, and have encountered the same problems women had, plus more.

Some examples are the effects of how gossip and rumors stigmatize Temple men.

First there are the vengeful women who go to extremes to slander a man’s reputation because they feel that they were “played” during a relationship.

Then there are those who have much less than a relationship with a man, but still eliminate others because of a negative personal experience.

Then there are the various cliques at Temple. Women form cliques and often combine each other’s personal horror stories about men and create a whole alliance against the male student body.

I, along with others, hear the line all the time: “I’ll never mess with guys that go here, because they’re all sluts and dogs and only want you for sex.” Granted, there are many attractive women here, but not everyone is a dog. If it takes one year, two years or your whole college career, it’s true that there is always someone out there for you. If you live on-campus and are tired of on-campus T.U. men, there are always the thousands of commuters who make up more than half of the student body.

I know men here who have had relationships with T.U. women and gone through hell, but choose not to rule out the entire female population. That’s what relationships are about: You live and learn through each one. I’m sure the issue of men and women who choose not date each other at the same institution is discussed at many college campuses across the country. If students do encounter problems dealing with relationships at their home institution, dating someone at another college is always an alternative. I guess what my grandmother said was right: “The grass is always greener on the other side.”

On the flip side, I feel sorry for the women here who live and die with the assumption that all Temple guys are dogs. If you let these negative women create an illusion in your head that every man here is out for a one-night stand, you will miss out on that one special guy in the crowd.

This will be the guy who is succeeding academically, making a large effort to better himself and his family and being a student leader in his own right.

Even if you have made an effort to build a solid relationship with someone at Temple and could not withstand the pressure, there are men at U.Penn, Drexel, St. Joseph’s, etc., where maybe you can find “Mr. Right.”