We finally did it. We, the staff of The Temple News, broke all the rules and celebrated Thanksgiving early this year in the office.
Mashed potatoes and butter, turkey and gravy, cranberry, fruitcake and green bean casserole provided a night of chaos in our lonely corner of the Student Center. But these tasty Thanksgiving traditions weren’t cooked, canned or chilled – they were carbonated and liquefied and put into soda bottles.
That’s right. We drank Thanksgiving in the form of a carbonated beverage. For many of us, the outcome of binging on Jones Soda Co.’s limited edition holiday pack was overwhelming. Slight headaches and mild nausea followed our early celebration of Thanksgiving. A few of us regretted this holiday homage to the soda gods.
“I just threw up and swallowed it – twice,” said a staff member after drinking the Mashed Potato Soda.
During our drink-off, we tested our will-power with five of the country’s most unique drinks. The atmosphere was filled with anticipation as each staff member toasted to the holiday that celebrates the founding of America.
The drinks really did smell like a complete Thanksgiving dinner, but the actual tastes varied in comparison to the real food. One staff member couldn’t handle the sizzle of the green bean casserole, and his meal came back up and into the “paper only” trash can.
Another member recognized the importance of such a special occasion in The Temple News office.
“Can I call you back? I’m drinking Thanksgiving dinner,” said a staff member, who received a phone call in the middle of the celebration.
The conference room smelled like Thanksgiving dinner for three hours.
“The room smells like puke,” said another staff member after all of the soda bottles were opened.
The limited edition gift set included all the utensils needed for the dinner – a toothpick and a straw. The beverages have no calories and no carbs, so we didn’t feel so bad about drinking them. Well, we did feel pretty bad afterwards.
Jones Soda Co. has unique approach to its labels. They are submitted by real customers and made into labels for the bottles. On one of the bottles, a delightful photo of a man smiling at a turkey was a sweet alternative to a bitter turkey & gravy soda.
And yes, we opened the windows because some of the staff was intoxicated by the overwhelming smell of turkey and mashed potatoes. Most of us found found something to be thankful for that night in the office – that most of us didn’t vomit.
The limited edition holiday pack is sold out online. The turkey & gravy soda sold out in the first three hours after it was released on Nov. 11. There still, however, may be packs left in select stores like Target. Check out Jones Soda Co.’s Web site, www.Jonessodastore.com for more soda information or to find out how to submit a photo.
Alysha Brennan can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.