Corrigan: Men should embrace the gay friend

Corrigan tells men to embrace their significant other’s gay friends instead of pushing them away.

John Corrigan

John CorriganIn honor of National Coming Out Week rapidly approaching, I’m determined to tackle a contemporary issue in relationships.

While the LGBT community advances in the perennial struggle for acceptance by mainstream American society, gay men are increasingly gaining confidence in their lifestyle and, subsequently, emerging in the public eye.

Well, the straight guy is starting to beware the queer eye due to how comfortable his girlfriend is becoming with gay guy friends.

Instead of conjecturing as to why women are attracted to gay guys, I polled ladies of various Pennsylvania colleges to discover the rationale behind this fact of life.

Typing this seems offensive, but the majority of girls said that gay guys are fun to befriend because they’re just like “one of the girls.”

Jenna Klakowicz, a sophomore accounting major at Saint Joseph’s University reveals that gay guys are typically more fun to converse with.

“You can talk about anything and everything with them — there are no limits,” Klakowicz said.

Amy O’Neill, a sophomore business major at Temple, reveals why girls feel more comfortable divulging with their gay friends.

“Gay guys not only are more open toward sensitive situations, but also provide a male’s point of view on things,” O’Neill said.

Bloomsburg University’s Caroline Bush, a sophomore secondary education major, explains how her gay friend differs from the straight guys that roam campus.

“Sometimes guys come off as cocky when they boast about how many girls they made out with at parties, but [my friend] never comes off that way,” Bush said. “He treats girls like people, not objects. You feel comfortable around him. Maybe it’s because you know that with [him], he is not looking for anything more than your friendship.”

It’s natural to despise the gay friend.

He is close with your girlfriend, she cares for him and he definitely serves as the soundboard for all of her complaints about you.

However, you must befriend him, as he is not a threat to your relationship.

First make sure that he bats for the other team before you agree that it would be a barrel of laughs if they went to the spa together.

You can’t get jealous, and even worse, you can’t let your girl know that you’re jealous.

Envying the attention that your significant other gives to her gay friend only demonstrates your insecurity. Showing weakness is a stark contrast from exhibiting vulnerability.

Look no further than timeless, coming of age TGIF staple, “Boy Meets World.” When Cory Matthews injures his ankle at the ski lodge, cute mountain girl Lauren senses his vulnerability and wants his melancholy soul to glide down her slope.

If Cory was whining about Topanga’s ever-expanding fanny, then Lauren would avoid him due to his chauvinistic nit-picking.

Women endure enough drama with their friends and they aren’t interested in emotionally weak dudes.

Once she realizes that you resent the bond between her and her friend, you instantly become the third wheel. Girls don’t want you to judge their friend, especially because of his sexual orientation.

Complaining about her friendship will translate, in her mind, as you smothering her. By overcoming the green-eyed monster, you maintain your masculinity.

In addition to jealousy, another sensation that you need to combat is paranoia.

Perhaps you and your girl argue about whether the beggar in the subway really needs the all-too specific 85 cents.

This escalates into a verbal tirade about your lack of compassion and subsequent money obsession, which finally ceases after you deliver a low-blow regarding her Salvation Army-quality present for your birthday.

So now you’re in the eye of the storm, and she flees to shelter at her gay friend’s abode where venting and tequila shots are the rhythm of the evening.

Sure, you’re getting roasted, but don’t blame her friend for being a reliable one. Don’t allow your anxieties to get the best of you.

You don’t need to bend over backward for the guy, but any friend of your girlfriend’s deserves your respect.

If you’re too stubborn, remember to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Holding a grudge against your girl’s gay friend is not worth sacrificing the relationship.

Here’s a new cliché that may hit a little close to home: Chick-fil-A can thrive even after discriminating, but your meat isn’t that tasty.

John Corrigan can be reached at


  1. “Instead of conjecturing as to why women are attracted to gay guys” – How about you conjecture as to why closed-minded people, too often straight males like yourself, oust gay males from social circles? Perhaps women choose to socialize with gay males because they often don’t project such outright sexism as yourself, as they have likely endured so much already? Perhaps women also feel more comfortable with gay males because, like females, they don’t desire sexual gratification and rather want to be friends WITHOUT “benefits”.
    Please note that this is not to degrade males, rather, to enlighten the feeble-minded like yourself, John Corrigan.

  2. Temple News needs to set a higher standard for their publication. It’s unreal that this was approved. I’m offended and disgusted by just about everything contained in this text. This is embarrassing and it makes the Temple community look bad. This article needs to be immediately retracted in all forms.

  3. How about embracing the gay friend because he is a human being and inherently worthy of your respect because you are not a goddamn animal?

  4. it’s not titled why STRAIGHT men should befriend gays, but “why MEN should”. Implying gay males aren’t men. Awesome.

  5. Oh no, my significant other is friends…with ANOTHER MAN? I’m going to be whiny and passive aggressive about it and view their friendship with suspicion because I once saw a television show where cheating happened? Oh wait, he’s gay? Are you sure? Just because he says it? Oh, is it because in my mind he acts like a sitcom staple of a gay guy?

    Please. You are the worst. Your writing sucks, your views are bizarre and late by about four decades, and if your view of relationships and the things that come with it (her family, her friends) are really simply about some sort of competition that you need to endure to spare her wrath, you should stop dating because that’s weird. She has a life outside of dating you, despite what you once went through in 8th grade; you don’t need to be crazy about it.

  6. “It’s natural to despise the gay friend.” Perhaps for someone as laughably given to accepting heteronormative stereotypes as yourself, but not so for the rest of us who have taken the time to get to know other people as actual human beings. Did the Temple News even bother to print anything from the perspective of a member of the LGBT community for NCOW, or is it all just these botched attempts at “progressivism”?

  7. This is among the most offensive things I’ve read in a long time. Gay men aren’t men? Or part of “mainstream American society?” The author and the publication ought to be ashamed.

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