Where would we be without treacherous hangovers? I know I certainly wouldn’t have caught every delicious second of the Screen Actors Guild Awards without one. Who knew that eight Advil, two gallons of water and Teri Hatcher made a party?
You heard it here first.
The SAG Awards, admittedly, isn’t on par with the Oscars or even the Globes. It’s a bunch of actors giving each other awards. Still, it’s got a better guest list than any party you haters out there would throw (you know I love you).
Talking points: Glenn Close is God. Miss Hatcher is unstoppable, likewise for Best Actor shoo-in Jamie Foxx.
Million Dollar Baby is gaining heat as well. Best Actress Hilary Swank, Best Supporting Actor Morgan Freeman. Gorgeous.
Best Ensemble Cast: Sideways, with a shockingly underrated Sandra Oh accepting the award. Miss Oh is the name to know-check out her amazing work in the short Barrier Device and in the first season of campy WB hit Popular.
The upset-Jennifer Garner for Best Dramatic Actress. I’m not well. Garner isn’t doing me like she did. Whatever.
I have something bigger than SAG, kids. Big for Temple anyway. I know a secret. I know a celebrity that has been booked to speak at the Student Center in mid-April.
Wanna know who it is? Huh? Do ya?
Fine. It’s MJ, from Real World: Philly. I’ll have more details for you later, just want to put a battery in your back for now.
Also, some upcoming events with Dirt potential: Philadelphia College Fashion Week. SHE Magazine editrix and Temple fashionista Ally Leak is calling the shots. That’s happening end of March. Love it.
What’s more beautiful than Lindsay Lohan’s cleavage? Jennifer Lopez and her Rebirth. You know “Get Right” is my song. And if you don’t, ask a friend. I love even more her self- obsession: she plays 20 different versions of herself in the new video. La Lopez gives good face, and that’s all that matters round these parts.
Sorry if I’m nasty-I’m still hung-over. You know who’s kind of nasty and perpetually hung-over? That dirty simple Chloe Sevigny. She moans and groans to Details mag that she’s desperately tired of being such an indie princess. She claims she tries to audition for frothy, commercial films all the time and gets turned down.
And God knows the indie film world is just banging her door down. When the hell was the last time we saw her? Oh yes, that would be going down on Vincent Gallo in The Brown Bunny.
Highest paid “actress” for a stunt like that. Sevigny will next be seen in Woody Allen’s Melinda and Melinda. Instead of being grateful for the work, she’s saying she disapproves of Woody sleeping “with his daughter and then married her.”
Damn. Time for my third nap. Until next time!
Matt Donnelly can be reached at email@example.com.