I’m convinced there is a correlation between reality TV shows and the increasing stupidity of American culture. These shows seem to be getting more ridiculous and quite far from being real.
One of these shows is I Want a Famous Face. It is yet another brainless child of, you guessed it, MTV. The episodes of this makeover documentary – which airs Monday at 10:30 p.m. (in case you wanted to dumb yourself down for a night) – profile young people and their befores, durings and afters of plastic surgery. But the kicker is that these people aren’t only getting plastic surgery to make themselves look better. They’re getting other people’s faces-famous faces.
The first episode followed Mike and Matt – brothers who wanted to look like Brad Pitt. Sorry, when I said brothers, I also meant twins. First of all, twins are already rare and strange creatures of nature. But twins getting the same plastic surgery is just a tad disturbing.
According to the MTV Web site, if Mike and Matt look like Brad, “they will make it big and women will finally want them.”
Dear Mike and Matt: Neither of you looks like Brad Pitt – at all. If you want women to want you, stop trying to be other people, get some self-confidence and possibly a dermatologist. (The boys had severe acne that they and the surgeons seemed to be unaware of.) Love, Nina. P.S. Your lives are jokes.
Anyway, they looked different, but no amount of plastic surgery could have ever helped these guys look like Brad Pitt. In fact, it’s difficult to change your face to look like anyone who isn’t you. You can always change who you are, but I thought keeping your identity was the whole point. I must have been out of the country when identity theft started to get cool. Thank God.
Fox also has some new reality crap. It’s called The Swan. Each episode shows two women who undergo intense changes, physically and mentally. Along with the plastic surgery, they exercise, eat healthy and attend therapy sessions on how to attain their goals in life. How sweet.
But after all was said and done, the prettier of the two was chosen to compete in “The Ultimate Swan Beauty Pageant.” So, after teaching self-confidence, all they did was send one woman home crying because she wasn’t pretty enough. Does anyone else find that evil?
People who want plastic surgery almost always lack self-confidence or have some sort of a negative self-image. These things need to be addressed. A new face doesn’t mean a new personality. Plastic surgery masks, literally, psychological problems.
Dear America: I love you, but your level of stupidity is rising at a rapid rate. You should start encouraging your people to love themselves for who they are. Tell them they are beautiful, and we only need one Brad Pitt. Instead of telling them to get a tummy-tuck, tell them to find a treadmill. Love, Nina.
Nina M. Sachdev can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.