A wide-open end to the honeymoon phase in Italy

A student reflects on her time studying abroad in Italy and how her journey opened her eyes to how misogyny is built into other cultures.

JUAN COLON / THE TEMPLE NEWS

When I first arrived for my semester abroad in Italy in January 2024, each day felt invigorating. There was beauty to be seen everywhere — I admired the rich architecture, history, food and fashion of Rome. I ordered a coffee with a smile using the very little Italian I knew, and most of the time, baristas and cashiers were kind in return. 

Time in Italy moves slowly; people are grounded in the present, on their phones less and appreciating life for what it is. This was an obvious cultural difference from the United States that influenced my habits in positive ways. In Italy, I felt more inclined to learn more about myself through spending time alone, journaling and detaching from technology. As I adapted to the culture, feeling more present in the moment and taking time for myself came naturally to me. 

Following the first week of class, I decided to take my first solo day trip to Florence. I was excited to visit the leather market, Mercato Nuovo, that people had told me about. While browsing the market, I stopped to look at patterned, blue scarves at one of the vendor stalls. The older man working was trying his hardest to sell them to me, saying, “I’ll give you a good price, anything for you.” 

I told him I had just got to the market and would think about it while I looked around some more, but that wasn’t a good enough answer for him. He told me not to leave and he would walk around with me, which I respectfully declined. 

As I started walking away, I felt his hand grab my neck and start rubbing my back, attempting to pull me closer. I continued to say “no thank you” while raising my voice, but he still wasn’t getting the message. This left me no choice but to run out of the leather market as he yelled after me, “But why? I’ll give it to you for free!”

Before I left for Rome, my friends and family who had already been to Italy warned me about the frequency of catcalling in Italy. Women especially expressed their concerns, saying things like, “Traveling alone? You better be careful, the men are very forward.” 

I kept this information in the back of my mind, but I was confident in my street-smart skills and ability to keep myself safe when traveling alone. However, my leather market experience opened my eyes to the increased misogyny in places outside of the U.S. and marked the end of my honeymoon phase of living in Rome. 

I thought being away from America would allow me to escape societal issues like misogyny and catcalling. Instead, exploring Italy exposed me to these experiences on a more intense level than ever before.

I’ve never had a stranger, let alone an older man, openly touch me in that way. I was especially confused because I was sure I had given him no reciprocating impression that I would welcome such behavior. 

I stay aware of my surroundings and have experienced catcalling before, which happens everywhere in the world to a degree. But in a new country and city, my sense of appreciation was diminished by the constant need to stay alert, which often isn’t enough for protection. 

The situation at the market wasn’t the only time I experienced catcalling. While walking home from class one day, a group of men aggressively complimented me. Two younger Italian girls who overheard and recognized my discomfiture, said to me, “I’m very sorry about the men in Rome.”

My negative experience is not meant to discount Italy, as I met many wonderful people and had plenty of positive interactions during my semester there. However, I accepted the fact that because of my gender, I was more susceptible to men targeting and exploiting me. 

Traveling alone naturally increases vulnerability and the likelihood of unpleasant and dangerous experiences. I’m not the first to undergo the aggressiveness of men in Italy; this is a collective experience for women, especially tourists. I was warned many times before leaving for my semester abroad, but it didn’t click until I experienced the catcalling and unsolicited touching firsthand.

These uncomfortable situations sparked reflection about the issue of objectification toward women in Italy, which clashes with my values of independence and privacy. During my travels, I became mindful to set boundaries and maintain personal space while remaining confident in myself. 

I started to analyze Italian culture in comparison to my own in the U.S., reflecting on the ways I am taken care of and how I am not taken care of. I found through my observations and coursework at Temple Rome that the underlying misogyny in Italy derives from religion, history, customs and social standards. 

While Europe is just as beautiful and magical as I had imagined, there is both beauty and ugliness in every society. Exploring new communities through firsthand experiences helps individuals understand cultures for what they are, furthering one’s global sensitivity and competence. 

I’ve learned through both positive and negative experiences how traveling to new countries and cities shows efforts to strengthen cultural knowledge, which is arguably one of the most effective skills to have in life. 

I brought my insight home, recognizing the importance of self-protection and that understanding diverse cultures and environments can be applied universally. Every country has flaws, and it’s important to speak on the issues of misogyny and safety while traveling so women can further their awareness, protect themselves in difficult situations and embark on new adventures with confidence.

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